I think itвЂ™s going to be important for you to remember that none of what has happened is your fault.

YouвЂ™re right that this is a much heavier problem than we typically deal with. Looking? I think? At me like that Loaf! IвЂ™m just expressing empathy for our letter writer, which I have been told I should do more because I need to consider other peopleвЂ™s feelings on issues and not just center my own experiences and I am TRYING, MR. Being *abandoned* by someone who helped *create you* must be terrible. I know this is outside the scope that you usually deal with, but we have found listening to your program has brought us solace, and we thought we might as well see if you have any advice for living in a world that doesn't want you. Most of my brothers and sisters hate everyone on this world, hate our parents for creating us, and due to the deep-seated racial hatred most of us hate ourselves and each other as well. We have not succeeded at all in helping the two sides find common ground, except insofar as they both hate us. It was a terribly thought out experiment, and it did not go well at all. They trained us all in diplomacy and mediation from a young age before revealing us to the world. Since they were of separate species, they were not able to procreate, so they turned to genetic engineering to produce hybrid offspring. They believed hybrid children might help the two species find common ground and facilitate discussion. My parents were among those who wanted to change that. It is home to two sentient races which have never learned to get on peacefully. Loaf: You can have those limbs, Janet, and I do not begrudge you them. I just, feel so efficient in my warm, dry, human body with its limited number of limbs. Because there was like only one tangent! Well, two, now, including this one. Wow, this was the fastest intro weвЂ™ve done in a while. Janet: Yeah, maybe do the cello piece with your e-mail. Except when one is trying to convey complex technical concepts, when it mostly fails as a language. Loaf: Music really is the universal language. We would like, definitely answer that question to the best of our combined abilities. I would love a custom electric cello piece for our show. Actually, can someone really do this? That sounds really cool. Janet: If a thing in your life is not good, please e-mail us at or compose an instrumental electric cello piece that evokes the mood and emotion behind your question, so that we can sigh and empathize with your pain and suffering without having to do much more than sigh about it.

Loaf: And welcome to another episode of Solutions to Problems, where we take things in your life that are not good and try to make them not not good. Loaf: Greetings, gentle listeners! My name is Loaf, this is my cohost Janet. Computer Voice: YouвЂ™re listening to a program on IFM 2 Subspace Radio.

Narrative causality